I did math again

I did math again for the first time in what feels like years.

I found a job at MIT Media Lab that looks so awesome. I'm almost qualified for it. I just need figure out if the engineering is really for me. The perfect interdisciplinary life is waiting for me, somewhere.

It was the last day of my Confucius Institute Chinese Class. I left work ten minutes early, and the sunset came at me in between tunnels on muni as chocolate covered espresso beans took over my feelings.

Chinese was weird, but I really appreciate the friends I made in that class. We saw the propaganda arm come out a little bit, which was funny.

In the dungeons of the Civic Center Bart station a girl sat next to me factoring polynomials and I thought... that could be me.

I'm 870 pages into 1Q84. A main character is a math prodigy and math teacher, and I'm a little jealous of him.

And then I finally cracked open Boas when I got home, and I took half a page of notes and did two quick arithmetic problems before I started to tear up. Not from a panic attack or anything, but just from seeing an old friend who I had a falling out with and I might be ready to forgive.

It's not fun yet, but it doesn't hurt as bad. I'm going to take it very slow, and forgive myself as well.